Admin note ~ For a year I have kept this letter in a folder on my desktop, waiting until the time felt right to publish it.  With David’s recent visit to the Philippines came a series of emails from VLM, excerpts of which I have attached, with her permission, at the conclusion of this post.

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Hello everyone,

I have been a lurker here for a long time now and I enjoy reading all your wonderful articles and comments – it is the first thing I do each morning when I wake up and check in again before I go to sleep at night.  Thank you for the immense pleasure you have given me.
I want to share this with you – I have let some people read it but it has never been published in a well-known site.  It is over a year old but nevertheless, I want to share it with you.  I’m an older fan and this is my story.

It is hard losing a child.  Doubly so if he was your only child.  That is not how nature works.  It is the child who puts a Dad or a Mom to rest not vice versa.

And so began my journey to darkness.  It was the final goodbye that left an empty place in me.  The pain was overwhelming: no medicine, diversion, luxury, no words would help cease the breaking of my heart.  It was so hard to go on believing and trying to live and forget my son was gone forever.  I went to the cemetery daily, rain or shine and I cried myself to sleep each night.  My husband became desperate and sent me to a well-known head doctor but she couldn’t help either.

I remember the day so well.  I was idly surf-channeling and came upon American Idol.  This guy was just starting to sing “Imagine” – and now still, I reflect on that particular song – and it was that first step, or the beginning of being healed. The way he sang it was very profound and touching – it felt like the opening of a window and airing out a stuffy room.  It was like finding the key to the door that had been long shut.  I let the words flow through my heart and soul and as his voice dipped and soared, it was like finally discovering the right medication for a lengthy ailment.

My friends and a few of my family think I have really lost my marbles.  How in the world could a song (now songs) or a person (an 18 yr-old man/child) who doesn’t even know me be the force behind my reorientation to life?  They do not understand how his voice could do that.  They have no understanding that his voice is the “new kindling” that burns within me.  I am slowly learning how to use the internet and I surf and YouTube David early in the morning, noontime and late at night.  I now have this desire to continue forward on the road of life.

David has indeed made a difference.  His quiet demeanor reminds me so much of the son I lost.  He had no prior symptoms and when he had his first seizures, his cancer was terminal.  He was in and out of the hospital, underwent so many treatments (many of them painful) but through them all, he didn’t complain.  How I wish he had known David!  In fact, on my weary days, I sit and listen to Angels and I feel he is close to me, his love reaching out through the song.

I also wish that people would understand that the power of a person through a song is infinitely more than we can ask or imagine.  So I end this with a quotation:

” What is this melody and song

This tiny whisper that I hear?

It weaves a voice of hope

Through the emptiness of my heart.,

To call forth its cry: You are well-loved,

Fear not, you will always be in my heart.”

Sifting, sorting, reaching,

Always finding many things.

Thank you David!  Thank you everyone, fans of David, the Voice!

Life will never be the same but I am slowly moving forward.  God bless you all!

VLM

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Hi there Angelica,

We just had a long holiday last week – with all Soul’s Day and all Saint’s Day – our custom is practically staying in the memorial park – it is really like a fiesta on those days over here – people put up tents, bring in music and food and many sleep there. We spent the 2 days near my son’s grave – it was a hard time for me – so I listened to David on my ipod to keep me sane and comforted.

I am so thrilled that David is coming to our country. I want to go to Manila but with our situation, I doubt it. However, I will still TRY and will ask (beg) my husband – JR will surely keep you and the rest posted.

This is too long now. I feel I have to tell you why I have been silent for such a long time. The “Voice’ helps me keep my sanity – More power to you and the group.
God bless,

VLM

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Hello Angelica,

I asked my husband if I could see David – he didn’t say a word – so it will be “so near, yet so far” scenario for poor me – I still believe I will be able to see him in the future – the internet and the papers will keep me posted. Since the 16th will be a holiday, I will be able to sit down and watch his arrival on the news station (it airs at 6:30pm daily).
It is so nice to hear from you again.
God bless.

Hugs,

VLM

Friday, November 19, 2010

Dear Angelica,

Finally, JR was able to give my little gift to David. My heart is so full (even now) – I have been on the computer since he arrived – switching channels just to be able to catch him on the news. He was everywhere and I am so proud our press gave him the spotlight for the 2 days he was here.

I cried and cried when my husband said NO – I spent the entire afternoon in the memorial park talking to my son – just telling him of my disappointment and frustration. I brought along my ipod – I listened to “Imagine” maybe a hundred times – David was here in the Philippines and poor me was so far away.

I read Glady’s beautiful article.  How I wish you could also put my story there for everyone to read how this young man has changed my life – he is so precious to me – I think of him as my son replacing the one I lost.  I thank you and all the staff for “The Voice.”  I hope to live to a hundred so I can see him get his Grammy.  More power!
It is so nice to hear from you again.
God bless.

Hugs,

VLM

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Dear Angelica,

Thank you for your reply – your letter warms my heart. My favorite grocery is constantly playing CFTH – I linger there just taking my time until the final track –
You are the best person to edit my article – I just want to share my story – do you know that by constantly repeating “Imagine” in my car, our driver already knows the lyrics by heart? He is also familiar with David’s voice because when we switch to the radio, he says to me “Ma’am that’s your favorite singer”. 🙂

I sent him all kinds of mango products, plus a few of other dried fruits as well (jackfruit, santol and pineapple).  I know he got a ton of goodies as well.

Take care.  God bless.

Love,

VLM

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Dear Angelica,

I got my TOSOD last night…and although I have been hearing the songs…there is nothing like the physical cd.  Sometimes I think I am going crazy for caring so much about a young man I haven’t even met.  When he came and I missed the opportunity, it was as if the sky fell on me.  My husband is slowly, slowly learning to accept my passion for David’s voice, his songs and just everything about him.

Thank you again.  What a wonderful Christmas present you are giving me!

Hugs,

VLM