bebereader
djafan
voiceadmin
From remarks made here at The Voice and in chat, it appears we are headed into another Hurricane David season. Judging from the early information coming in, it could be a Category 5. So I thought it was time to post some emergency preparedness information.
COPY AND POST IN YOUR HOME:
1. Have paddles fully charged and at the ready.
2. Check oxygen tanks.
3. Check supply of smelling salts.
4. Have anti-spazz medication re-filled for extreme attacks.
5. For THUD protection-have pads and pillows handy on the floor. Helmets only if needed.
6. Older fans might want to check their Depends supply.
Alert family members or a friend what to do should they find you exhibiting any of these conditions.
.1. Babbling incoherently-only able to point.
2. In a stupor- unable to speak-only point.
3. Have face lock—unable to close mouth and eyes bug out.
4. Weeping uncontrollably.
5. Weeping and smiling, babbling, and pointing all at the same time. (BAD)
6. Having an ear to ear smile that lasts for 4 hours or more.
7. Look like you stuck your finger into a live light socket.
8. Are sitting or laying in the fetal position with a blank stare stuttering D-D-D.
9. Have uncontrollable chair dance spasms.
TREATMENT:
Have the responder gently remove you from in front of the computer and guide you to a darkened room where you can lay down- play some soothing David music, i.e. Fields of Gold-Somebody Out There and quietly close the door and leave you alone!
RESPONDERS:
It is important that you DO NOT do any of the following:
1. Criticize.
2. Make snide remarks.
3. Roll your eyes.
4. Attempt an intervention.
IF YOU ARE ATTENDING A CONCERT:
1. Try to sleep the night before (good luck).
2. Stay hydrated.
3. Remember to eat.
4. Try to remember who you came with (in case of a stupor or separation).
5. If you are meeting David –expect to get hit with Archuheimers disease (you will not remember your name or that you can say anything that makes sense.
6. That disease will wear off in a couple of days –to be replaced by a feeling of sadness and melancholy that your experience was over too soon.
7. That feeling will wear off in a month or so and you will be plotting and planning and conniving ways to attend another concert.
8. Then back to the computer and all the wonderfulness it holds.
The Voice David Archuleta 